I'm sure by now you've all heard of the escape of New York prison inmates Richard Matt and David Sweat. These murderers are being compared to the most awesomest of all movies "Shawshank Redemption". They used power tools in the dark of the night to escape a maximum security prison, had a get away car and one would assume, a way to blend into society because it's been over a week, and their asses haven't been caught yet.
Many questions are being asked about this.....how did they get their hands on these tools? How long were they doing this? Who was helping them? Where are they?!?!
At the time this story broke, my boyfriend busted out with....I wonder who in the prison was helping them? I remember thinking...who would do that? I watch Lockup religiously....it's hard to sneak anything into prison. Workers and visitors are searched and where they would have to hide anything to sneak it in....well all I can say is ouch....that's not going into my ass or vagina!
As it turns out my boyfriend is brilliant and it took just one day to come out that they did, in fact, help help. Her name is Joyce Mitchell, a middle aged grandmother who, it turns out, was banging both of them! She's an animal!! She was suppose to drive the getaway car, have them kill her husband and dive off into an orgy of glorious threesomes, but she had a panic attack and didn't go through with it. Why would a hard working woman stick power tool bits into her bits, sneak them to these two killers who she's having prison sex with (sooooooo hot), agree to get them out of dodge, kill her husband then run away with them?? Why would she do this? Rumor has it Richard Matt has a giant penis.
There you have it in a nut shell.....giant penis = huge vaginal cavity to sneak it all in.
Crabbie Chris
Do you love a good prison story? I DO! Share them with me.
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